I was having a moment the other day when I took this picture of Alyssa. She was waiting for her ride to pick her up for dance. It seemed like just minutes earlier that I was her age going to my first dance classes. So often I think about looking forward to things. I think it is human nature and survival. I think to myself so often "time will heal my Mom's passing.....", or "I just need to get through this pregnancy", or "once we get through residency".......the list can really go on and on. But lately I have just been missing the time that once was. I miss the time of being little, and getting already for dance, school, or piano.....I miss get tucked into bed by my own parents, I miss the laughing and teasing by my brothers.....I miss waiting for Bec to come home from dates and living vicariously as her younger sister. I miss so many things lately.....and I just realized while looking at Alyssa this particular day that I just didn't want her to grow up and get big. There is such a part of my that wants to always tuck her into bed at night, always sing popcorn popping (Catherine's fav) to Cath ten times a day, always have Mikey whirlwinding into my bed trying to tackle or tickle me.....I am going to miss those things. I miss my life as it once was, but am so so grateful for my life that now is.