Wednesday, May 6, 2015

Motherhood On My Mind......

This week I am mindful of Mother's.  I am thoughtful about  my own Mother and all the wisdom and love she gave to me and all of her kids.  I could not have been raised by a better Mother.  Since she has passed away I still feel her love often and know that she is just as big a part of my life today as she was when she was living.  I am grateful for that knowledge.  I know it because I feel it in my soul day in and day out.  

Today I went to sonic for an early bird diet coke.  Sonic is across the street from where I live, and early bird diet coke's have become a bad but loved habit.  My sonic run is usually quite uneventful and involves my two little's begging me for a slushy in which I usually give in.  Talk about great parenting.  However, today my sonic run was different.  I witnessed policeman surrounding a boy.  As I looked closer it was a boy I know, and a good friends son.  The police were surrounding him and I quickly grew alarmed.  I knew he had just gotten out of juvenile detention and is currently on probation with a ten year sentence waiting if he makes a mistake.  He has a drug problem.  

My heart sunk.....I knew I needed to call my friend and tell her that her son was with police.  I made the phone call.  It was difficult because she immediately knew he had relapsed.   He hadn't come home last night and she was up ALL night praying and worried.  She immediately jumped in her car and with her sister came to the police sight.  

Her son ended up not getting arrested because he was not the one driving under the influence.  He was however found most assuredly under the influence of drugs, and consequences will come.  He is eighteen years old and a good kid.  His Mom (my friend) immediately started crying when she came to the scene at Sonic.  She hasn't slept in days worried and sick.  I have never felt the feeling I felt at that moment.  I felt her pain, and the helplessness of the situation at hand.  She knows what is right for him.  He knows what is right, but he has addictions.  He has problems saying no to drugs and alcohol.  

I keep thinking in my head all day something my own Mother once said.  "It takes a lifetime to raise a child, but it can only take two weeks to lose one".  What she meant was .......Mother's have to be VIGILENT CONSTANTLY!  I can't afford to take two weeks off of motherhood because in two weeks a child's life can be completely altered because of bad choices that escalate so quickly.  

My friend is a loving and vigilant Mother.  She makes choices everyday that will help  her son get through this trial.  We all have trials, and this is a trial that she and her family are going through.  I was just reminded and saw first hand today how an addiction can ruin someones life.  It frightened me.   I find peace and strength in remembering to strive EVERY DAY to be a VIGILANT MOTHER ALWAYS!  

I think back on my life and my own Mother.  She was by my side always.  When I had a problem, she had a problem.  She didn't ever rescue me from my problems.  However, she stood by me, talked with me, guided me, and helped me through trials.  She was VIGILANT!  She asked me a million questions and was ALWAYS interested in my life.  She made sure I was in the right place at the right time the very best she could.  She pushed me to be better, and encouraged me with her words and actions.  

I had/have an AMAZING Mother.  The kind I hope and want to be.  She was the perfect Mother for me and for what I needed.  She still is.  I have an amazing Mother in Law.  She loves me and I know that.  How lucky am I to have such great examples in my life.   

Today I recognize that I want to be better.  I want to be a better Mother.  I want to be strong, loving, kind, and most paramount.....a wise mother.  Nothing else in the world truly matters to me as much as being the best Mom I can to Alyssa, Mikey, Sam, and Cath.  They are my most cherished loves.  Trials and addictions are real.  Everyone has trials.  As a Mother it is my job to be wise in steering my kids in a direction that will lead them from problems and lead them to freedom and happiness.  It is my job to be an example of light and hope.  It isn't always easy, but it will always be worth it.  

I am happy to celebrate and be mindful of Mother's day all week.  Everyday I smile while thinking and reminiscing of my own beautiful Mother.  


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